Taylor
If I had been nervous before, then what I was feeling as the house came into view can only be described as fear. A fear of something familiar was something I had never felt before and I tried not to think about it too much as the feeling that I was heading to my own execution became almost consuming. My stomach jumped up to my throat and back
again a few times and I swallowed, trying to calm it. I must have swallowed louder than I thought because Annie turned toward me a little from the front seat and made what I assumed was supposed to be an encouraging smile but turned out to be one portraying her own nervousness instead.
She was probably even more afraid than I was of the house. With good reason. In her place, I probably wouldn’t have been able to pass myself off as calm as she had been doing, staring out the windshield at the passing scenery. At least my execution would be quick like a guillotine. They’d probably burn her at the cross.
Lawrence looked at us both and the car suddenly, perceptibly, slowed down. He opened his mouth like he wanted to say something, but decided not to. Only kept going slower and slower, pretending like he didn’t quite know which house was my family’s, even though I’m sure he did since he had made sure he knew the directions there by heart the day before.
He pulled the car slowly into the driveway and I could almost hear the sound of execution drums somewhere in the distance. The car was parked and, shakily, I got out, remembering how ironic it was that only a few months ago, I was so adamant about leaving for the tour and now I didn’t really want to come back.
I stepped out onto the gravel and waited for something. I’m not quite sure what. Maybe some man in a black hood to come out to escort me to my guillotine or maybe a family member to show up. I looked over the car at Annie, who seemed to be waiting for the same thing I was. She felt my eyes on her and shrugged at me.
“Should we go in?” she said aloud.
I sighed and watched a car go by on the road, a horn honking as it passed the house. I could clearly see a girl waving from inside the car and, hesitantly, I waved back. It was only another reminder that the fans had no idea what was going on.
Before I could turn back, the sound of gravel crunching under running feet came closer and, just before I was nearly knocked over by te force of the running person, I heard the owner of the feet shout my name excitedly.
“Taylor!”
“Zac!” I said back, feeling a smile come to my lips, completely taken aback. There were times when Zac was little that he would do almost this very thing when I came home from spending the night at a friend’s house. Usually I just turned red and tried to shake him off as my friend watched on and laughed (as all of them did) and my first impulse was to do just that. But then I realized just what he was doing and that it wasn’t a negative thing and simply hugged him back.
He pulled away of his own accord a minute later and held me at arm’s length. His eyes were narrowed as they moved over me.
“Well, you look the same,” he commented, too quietly for Annie or Lawrence to hear him and I wasn’t sure I was even meant to.
“My hair’s a little shorter,” I pointed out, fingering my slightly shorter hair. It wasn’t a noticeable difference, but somehow I felt the need to point out that I wasn’t exactly the same. And neither was he. “You got a little taller,” I added.
“Yeah. Maybe pretty soon I won’t be the midget of the trio,” he said, grinning.
“I wouldn’t count on it,” I said. “I’m only fifteen. I’m still growing, too.”
He shrugged, but didn’t say anything as the rest of the family began to file out of the house in an uncharacteristic straight line. Zac stepped back, his head down a little, though nobody seemed to eye him like a traitor.
Suddenly, I found myself encompassed in hugs and drowned in kisses.
Mackenzie showed me a picture he had drawn me, Avery pointed out the band-aid on her knee from where she had scraped herself when she fell off of her bicycle (it must run in the family), Jessica held out the plate of brownies my mother had helped her make for me, encouraging me to take one. All my younger siblings seemed to be enthusiastic enough, as they always were when someone came to visit for a long time. But everyone else hung back. My mother kept her hand on Isaac’s back and his expression was undreadable. It didn’t take a mindreader to see that he was still angry with me.
At least something was as it felt like it should be.
Annie and Lawrence also hung back from the crowd and everyone decided to act like they weren’t there. Maybe if they weren’t there, we could all pretend like nothing had ever actually happened. I debated over letting that go and indulging myself in the enthusiasm that was brought on by my arrival back home or be insulted over it and bring Annie and Lawrence into this and run the risk of offending everyone and ruining everything real fast.
Luckily, Annie found a solution that was more neutral than either of those.
“Well, we should be going,” Annie said finally after nearly twenty minutes of greetings and show and tell. She looked about as uncomfortable as I had ever seen her and no less fearful than she had while we were in the car.
“Why so soon?” my mother asked. The question was strained. It was easy to see that she didn’t really want to ask it, but there was no point in stirring things up so early in the game. “Why don’t you come in for a cup of coffee or something?”
“No thanks, Diana,” Annie replied. “I mean, it’s not that we wouldn’t like to, but we kind of have somewhere to be and we should really let all of you catch up with each other.”
Her politeness was also strained. She sounded more like she wanted to say, “Let’s face it, you want to get rid of me and I don’t want to be here, so we should just go, right?” It seemed like something Parker would be brave enough to say, but Annie had the control to hold back.
The thought of Parker made me uneasy for a quick moment. To think that we were going to bring him in the middle of the battleground with a blindfold on was more than a little frightening to me.
“Oh? Where?” my mother asked next.
“A party we were invited to,” Annie said, waving her hand carelessly. “Some of Reese’s friends from work. I don’t really know them.”
“It’s a surprise birthday party for my friend Clarence Hill,” Lawrence added. “It’s his fortieth, so his wife’s making a huge deal out of it because he did for her and she wants to exact a little revenge.”
My mother smiled a little bit at his small show of humor. Lawrence wasn’t known for his humor, but at least someone had the decency to say something light-hearted in a situation like this one.
“All right, then we better let you go,” she said.
“It was nice seeing you again,” Lawrence responded, nodding at her.
She just smiled again as they both got in the car and drove away.
And I was alone with my family for the first time.
Does everyone know what a guillotine is? Did I even spell it right?
Chapter Three
Chapter Five
Does everyone know what a guillotine is? Did I even spell it right?
Chapter Three
Chapter Five